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Short changed January 23, 2008

Posted by modoathii in archive, TZedi.


Vipi kaka teksi?

Zii bro, sisi tuko besht.

Aaah, kaka braza teksi hii hapa. Na mwaonekana hamna gari.

Sawa msee, ngapi?

Elfu kumi!

Bana fanya kitu?

Sawa, elfu nane.


We ‘jomp’ into the teksi and the guy who hooked us up with the taxi comes over to our window.

Mko freshi kaka?

Tuko timam.

Sasa braza vipi?

Where we are from when someone asks ‘niaje?’ you gather he wants a tip for hooking you up with a ride. Like Kamjesh. The guys who ‘ask’ for 10/20/30 bob from every mathree that picks anyone from ‘their’ stage. Or the watchie who ‘asks’ for a ‘pao’ for ‘watching over’ your car as you go ‘dunda’.

I try as much as possible to ignore him. Which is kinda hard considering I was the guy he was communicating with. My D minus swahili/slang was way better than the one my pals couldn’t speak. So by default I became ‘translator’.

“Wee, you guys hook this jamaa up with something” I ask my pals.

My pals just gesture that they don’t got nothing (sic) and they care zilch

“Ras”, the ‘kamjesh’ pleads with me, “vipi braza nipe kitu.”

Frustrated and eager to rid us of my fellow ‘ras’ I dig into my pocket and unleash a hundred bob. I give it to him.


Ni hiyo tu man.


And we drive off leaving the guy pissed.

Now, it’s like this, if we were in Nai, Kenya for that matter, this would have been a major score for the ‘kamjesh’, but we were in Dar, a hundred bob in TZ is waaaaay less than 10 bob Kenya money (sic).

Not enough for a cuppa tea!

Hey, so I have issues with exchange rates.


1. egm - January 23, 2008

First time I landed stateside I had to stop mentally trying to convert those prices into shillings just so I could buy stuff! Exchange rates can mess you up.

2. threetypesofcrazy - January 23, 2008

woi, woi, woi they still make hundred bob in Tanzania shillings? wewe stop playing.Ama you meant 1000 Tshs? 100 seriously!

3. Xs - January 24, 2008

Kuwa serious!!! 100/18=Ksh5.50! Dude, si ungempa a juicy fruit chewing gum tu? LOL

4. bryjoe - January 24, 2008

that guy is still cussing you 🙂
just a 5.50 if Xs here is to be trusted.

5. Maua - January 24, 2008

I went home after 12 yrs abroad, and I couldn’t imagine some things. In my yrs fare was a bob, 35 bob felt like a rip off. But after converting Ksh to £££s, I felt better.

6. aegeus - January 24, 2008

rotfl…if only that was kenyan currency but tough luck man, pole sana kwake…hehe!!

7. Gishungwa - January 24, 2008

Exchange rates can make you think you are richer than you are.

8. crystalballs - January 25, 2008

This is how the brazzas fix you down here. They don’t tell you how much they want. at home utaambiwa ‘nipe kapao hivi’, here they leave you to jijazia, then they get pissed. heeheee.

The ones who have hung around Wakenya long enough are very specific, “nipe buku mbili hivi Ras, ah, dada Ras mbona wan’chunia?”
BTW, that one hundred bob…that buys two ballgums for the Princess, na bu-flight to tao is a minimum of three hundred soo…:D

9. bomseh - January 25, 2008

What he probably told others in your absence was, “huyo braza mKenya ni mbahiri sana.”

10. valentia - January 25, 2008

TZ..rem the first time I was given was it a 10,000 tsh??only to be told its less than ksh900..tsk tsk..hehehe

11. Unyc - January 26, 2008

LMAO…and u thot u were doing the guy a favour…next tyme beba lollipop…hehhee

12. Wanja - January 28, 2008

Yaani you pelekad your mkono gum across the border? No wonder they think Kenyans are mean.

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